Comments on: F3: Our Bright Horizon

By: » Top 10 Flashfic of 2008 >>Nostalgia For Infinity: Literature, Gaming, Punk Rock (and all that)

Tue, 23 Dec 2008 17:46:12 +0000

[...] Our Bright Horizons – A deliberate stylistic and thematic departure from much of what I’d written before. Difficult, but fun. [...]

By: Shaun CG

Shaun CG — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 10:35:21 +0000

Thanks, everybody, I’m *really* pleased this one seems to have worked out. It stretched some severely under-used writing muscles.

And wow, GLP, it reminded you of Delaney?! I’m going to take that as high praise indeed. ;)

By: neil

neil — Sat, 02 Aug 2008 21:27:32 +0000

Beautiful prose – Thanks Shaun, I really enjoyed this.

By: Gareth D Jones

Gareth D Jones — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 16:52:10 +0000

Love the exuberant metaphores (and similes).

By: GLP

GLP — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 15:25:44 +0000

I like this, Shaun. It reminds me of Delany’s “Aye…And Gomorrah” (well worth a read if you haven’t read it already). It has a sense of determination and optimism.

Although I like the phrase “the sun was at its brilliant peak” I think you were right to jettison the final paragraph. It makes the rest of it stronger.

By: Shaun CG

Shaun CG — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 13:51:57 +0000

I am a dirty, dirty revisionist. But it’s still Friday, so I guess it’s okay, right?

For anyone who’s curious, I removed the original final paragraph:

“Now, as we turn our minds back upon our journey I feel that we lost sight of that horizon, forgetting what it represented when the sun was at its brilliant peak. Too soon we turned inwards, letting our joy at the world become disinterest and contempt. Our response to a world of infinite possibilities was not to embrace but to exploit and discard them, until we were left with nothing but ourselves and each other, all empty vessels for narcissism, and as I reflect upon what we squandered I feel nothing but a sense of loss.”

You can see why it got jettisoned, right?

By: Shaun CG

Shaun CG — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 12:16:33 +0000

Actually… I think it might just be that last paragraph I don’t like.